Thursday, September 2, 2010

My Brain Hurts LOL!!!

I think I’ve had a BFO on something I’ve been wrestling with in my head for a long time now. I’ve had a problem with the whole make vs. want or make and let vs. cause and allow. I think I’ve finally figured it out and duh…it’s so obvious now…the difference between make and let vs. cause and allow is the attitude with which the message is delivered!! However, it’s not that simple: make and let implies force and lack of leadership, cause and allow infers suggesting and permitting.

I’ve included below the definitions I think of when I think of each word:
Make = force someone to do something whether they want to or not
Let = allowing things to happen willy nilly with no plan or leadership
Cause = suggesting someone do something
Allow = the unfolding of the “cause” or getting what you asked for

I’m still thinking on this subject but I wanted to get this much down quickly before I forgot what I was thinking.


Marion Princic said...

Good explanation - especially for me who doesn´t have english as a mothertongue.
And btw, it´s nice to have you back!
Grettings from Sweden
Marion & Milva

craigeagle23 said...

Hi Marion!! How have you been? I've been around just not very visible because I've been busy, busy, busy. I'm trying to get prepared to film L3 online and liberty by the end of the year. I'm also getting ready to do some obstacle challenges this fall and I'm going to take Renegade to the Parelli Rendezvous in October and maybe do some spotlights, both judged and just for fun. Stretching myself and my emotional fitness big time!!

I had been struggling with the make vs. want thing for so long and how being effective sometimes made me feel like I was making Renegade "do" things. I think I've finally got it sorted out in my mind not and's a great relief!!

Marion Princic said...

We are on the same journey :). I also try to film level 3 online and liberty and level 2 freestyle. Sometimes I wish Milva would have been started under the saddle before I bought her.
Parelli Rendezvous and spotlight!!! Can´t wait to hear and see more about it!!! You are so lucky to live where you live :)).
Make vs want is a big thing for me too, but your explanation helped me to put some clearity on it!

Beth M. Ramsay said...

Great revelation for you

Beth M. Ramsay said...

Glad for your revelation

craigeagle23 said...

@Marion - it does seem we are on much the same journey, Renegade was supposed to be started when I got him but he didn't have a clue! So...I was starting with a blank slate that had had poor ground handling and he was a mess!! Had I started with an easier horse, I'd be much further along by now but I wouldn't trade my journey so far for any other journey. It's been so rewarding to come so far with Renegade...and we're not done yet!!

@Beth - yes, this was a major revelation for me. I struggled with the whole make/let vs. cause/allow concept for a long time and it drove me crazy. I'm so relieved I'm beginning to get a handle on it but it sure took long enough!!